I'm not a big player of fantasy roleplaying games, but you don't have to be clearing a dungeon to know that everything is better with a Lich! It's got +5 cuteness, and -1000 smallness. I have no idea if what I just wrote makes any sense within any known gaming schema, but I'm going for it.
Ancient Celtic priest from the 3rd Century BCE? Why yes you are! Common set of character traits from a popular fantasy role-playing game and movie franchise? You're that too! Cuddly friend who may or may not turn into a bear? Yup, three out of three!
Harvest time! The time of year for harvesting your hard-earned crops! A crop of pumpkins! A crop of apples! A crop of...Plague farmers? Yep, it's a good time of year to harvest those!
Hey, it's ok to mess up. We can't all be perfect little angels! Sometimes we fall into the depths of despair...and fiery brimstone. But at least you won't be down there alone, 'cause this cute little dude is gonna be right there with you!
Mice live in burrows and birds live in nests. Ghosts live in…crypts? Graveyards? Old memories of childhood? No! They live in haunted houses! Gothic haunted houses where they can be roommates with ghouls, spirits, monsters, and that one guy who never does his dishes. How terrifying!
Were you also today years old when you figured out that Spongebob goes jellyfishing because he can't go ACTUAL fishing?! He's surrounded by fish! What's he gonna do - go around catching his Bikini Bottom brethren in nets?! My mind is blown. This isn't related to any of that, it's just a Jellyfish.
If you thought Black widows are just a snazzy character in a superhero franchise, you need to get out more! Except outside is where you'll find actual Black Widows, with venom 15x more deadly than a rattlesnake. Actually, you'll find them inside too. Not to freak you out or anything.
In Scottish folklore, the Kelpie will appear as a horse or a human in the water, and lure people to their demise! I would like to note that this particular Kelpie won't magically turn into a human while you're cuddling it. Or try to tempt you to a watery grave. Which is good.
Sit on a chair! Sit on a throne! Sit on this...toadstool? While a "stool" does sound like a comfy place to put your rear, in this particular case you would also be smooshing a cute little amphibian. So don't do that.
Rest in peace to all the Squishables that have come and gone before this one. Not a lot of time for digging holes right now so apparently they all had to be buried under one shared tombstone. Sorry guys!
